Recently in Humor Category

OK, it's only slightly related to criminal law, but, by God, how I miss college life.

Michael Medved has this op-ed in the WSJ, titled The Secrets of Tebow Hatred.  "The NFL is generously stocked with forgiven felons, including millionaire wife beaters and dog killers. So how did a clean-living quarterback with deep commitments to charitable service and miraculous last-minute victories become the most controversial player in the league?"

Yesterday, Fran Tarkenton had this op-ed in the same paper.

Before every game, no matter what team I was on at the time, the coach would always ask the most devout player to say a prayer....  No one ever asked to win the game, probably for fear that God would punish us for asking. After this moment of devotion, the team would all shout in unison, "Now let's go kill those S.O.B.'s!"

Excessive entanglement of church and football notwithstanding, it's so refreshing to see a good role model in sports that I will root for Tebow and the Broncs, particularly given that they are the underdogs.

Peter Kuitenbrouwer reports for the National Post (Canada):

Police in Chatham-Kent, Ont., announced Wednesday that, of 1,986 people arrested so far this year, 203 were Aries, whereas just 139 were Sagittarius.

*                              *                            *

Criminologists and astrologists dismissed the list -- released by the police on an otherwise slow day for both crime and news -- as not comprehensive enough to portray any patterns of crime. Then again, so did the police department.

*                              *                            *

Const. Pearce, who produced the data, concedes, "Next year the list could be completely different unless we arrest the same people."

Actually, given what we know about recidivism, the latter possibility is substantial.

As The Day with No Name looms on December 25, and we dash across the snow in a one-horse open vehicle, we ought not forget to display our Holiday Tree. 

Gov. Lincoln Chafee of Rhode Island, the man who recently declined to turn over a killer for federal prosecution because the federal government has the death penalty (as Kent noted here), has done it again.

A new study from across the pond:

Exeter Devon, UK: The results of a one year psychological study conducted by Dr. M. Shuttlecock, a noted London psychologist, has been published in the Surrey Psychological Observational Obsessive Functions (SPOOF) journal. The study investigated whether there is a relation between British football (soccer) and crime.

Despite the frequent hue and cry about sting operations, even the defense bar will have to agree this one was a real honey, not to mention quite productive.  Apparently there are 60,000 suspects.

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

The end of the world, previously set for May 21, has been rescheduled for tomorrow.  Justin Berton has this story in the SF Chron.  Prior post is here.

No, it's not Solyndra.  It's not Fast and Furious.

We all know that one of President Obama's strong suits is his ability to talk to the people.  Kinda the "Great Communicator," Part II.

Only now it's all under threat.  Will our President survive?  Read the shocking story.

For the true early-bird Christmas shoppers, Jimmy Kimmel Live has this shopping suggestion.  Quantities are limited though, so only the true early birds will catch the worms.

The 2011 Ig Nobel prizes were awarded last Thursday.  Most relevant to this blog was the Peace Prize, awarded to "Arturas Zuokas, the mayor of Vilnius, LITHUANIA, for demonstrating that the problem of illegally parked luxury cars can be solved by running them over with an armored tank."

The famous/notorious satire publication the Onion posted this story:

SACRAMENTO, CA--Faced with a mandate to cut the state's prison population by 30,000, the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation announced Monday it would begin allowing prisoners to serve their sentences online. "Inmates are required to log in promptly every morning at 6 a.m.," CDCR secretary Matthew Cate said. "But make no mistake, this is not some online holiday resort prison. Offenders spend at least eight hours a day entering data and can only see visitors in the chat room once a week. The real advantage of the Internet penitentiary is that it streamlines the entire corrections process, allowing a standard five-year sentence to be completed electronically in as little as three weeks." Cate added that while there was still a problem with prison rape, inmates could report an assault or any other issue by clicking on the "Ask the Warden" button.

That's funny enough, but even funnier is that Doug Berman posted it at SL&P, identifying it as from the Onion but not otherwise indicating it was satire, and one of the more excitable and clueless commenters there went ballistic.

There is a principle I call Swift's Law, in honor of the great English satirist Jonathan Swift.  Any time you write satire or use irony, no matter how obvious you think it is, somebody is going to take you literally.

Remember how we're so strapped for cash that we have to release prisoners before their sentences are up? 

Remember that?

Not to worry.  We still have dough for the really important things.

At one point in my career, I was a political appointee at DOJ with a big, fancy office.  But back then, we just had potato chips.

What this dog lacks in size he makes up in feistiness.  The LA Sheriff uploaded this video of an armed robbery of a smoke shop in Altadena.  The diminutive canine chases off the robbers.  One robber points a gun at the dog, but apparently the small, fast-moving target is too difficult for him.  The sheriff asks for tips regarding the suspects.

The California Supreme Court does not plan to decide any criminal cases tomorrow, but there is one opinion coming out that is destined for the Cases You Have to Look Up Just for the Name file:  Save the Plastic Bag Coalition v. City of Manhattan Beach, No. S180720.