Recently in Humor Category

How Voting Works

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The Onion explains it all.

Interrogation Technique

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This video featuring Benedict Cumberbatch and Jimmy Fallon will probably not be adopted by the Commission on Police Officer Standards and Training, but it's worth watching anyway.

An EMP Solution to the Email Issue

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For those who, like Bernie Sanders, are sick of hearing about Hillary Clinton's emails, the Onion reports that her campaign has come up with a solution:

NEW YORK--In an effort to prepare for any new revelations that might emerge about her emails during her tenure as secretary of state, Democratic presidential nominee Hillary Clinton reportedly told her staff Tuesday to ready the launch of several electromagnetic pulses to disable all of the nation's electronic devices.
Following up on my post yesterday, here is how not to do it.

Stool Pigeon...

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Peter Holley reports for the Washington Post:

A possible murder witness is talking.

The question is whether anyone should listen.

His name is Bud, and he's an African gray parrot in Ensley Township, Mich., with a filthy mouth, according to NBC affiliate WOOD-TV.

His latest phrase - the one he won't stop shouting at the top of his lungs mimicking his owner's voice - is a chilling one: "Don't f--ing shoot!"

The bird's antics might be laughed off, but it were not for the fact that Bud's owner, 45-year-old Martin Duram, was fatally shot at his home in May 2015, according to ABC affiliate WABC.  His body was found near his wife, Glenna, who had suffered a gunshot wound to her head but is alive.  Although police initially assumed Glenna Duram was a victim of the shooting, police reports obtained by WOOD-TV reveal that she is now a suspect in the slaying.

Law and Order writers...are you reading this???

Subtitle:  Pot Is Wonderful, Only Not So Much.

From Fox19Now, a TV station in Ohio:

A man in a Hamilton County courtroom finally gave in and pulled out two bags of pot from his underwear- a move that landed him an extra day of jail.

Hamilton County Municipal Court Judge Bernie Bouchard stopped court on Wednesday after an overwhelming smell of marijuana allegedly took over the courtroom. 

Bouchard gave everyone a chance to claim responsibility for the marijuana before he ordered deputies to bring drug dogs in the courtroom. 

The defendant, Darius Dabney, raised his hand and admitted to smoking marijuana before entering the courthouse.  

The ensuing exchange between the judge, the defendant and his lawyer is a hoot.  You can read it in the link



Presidential Humor

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Dan Zak at the WaPo has collected, in his view, "The single best joke told by every president, from Obama to Washington."  Well, except Grover Cleveland.  He alone gets to be the butt of a joke.  A couple of samples:

Ronald Reagan, to protesters at UCLA
"'Make love not war'? By the looks of you, you don't look like you could do much of either."

Abraham Lincoln
"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"

The Importance of Crew Coordination

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Completely off-topic, but too funny not to share.

Assault With a Cold-Blooded Weapon

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Terry Spencer reports for AP:

Florida wildlife officials say that 24-year-old Joshua James threw a 3.5-foot alligator through a fast-food restaurant's drive-thru window in October, according to multiple news outlets. He's charged with assault with a deadly weapon. Bail was set Tuesday at $6,000.

Officials say the incident occurred at a Palm Beach County Wendy's. They say that after an employee handed James his drink, he threw the alligator through the window and drove off. No one was hurt. James was arrested Monday.

James also is charged with illegally possessing an alligator and petty theft.

A Turkey of a Justice Department

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Advocates for federal sentencing "reform" and other pro-criminal priorities of President Obama's Justice Department want us to entrust early release decisions to, among others, the United States Attorneys and judges the President has appointed.

These are the same good people who have determined who'll be allowed to occupy the seat beside you on your next flight.  And no, I'm not talking about a Jihadist who might blow up the plane.

TWI

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Ryan Knutson has this article in the WSJ on the dangers of Texting While Intoxicated.  There's an app for that.

Simian Selfie Update

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For those who can't get enough of this off-topic topic ... 

What Not To Do During a Traffic Stop

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Here is a friendly video holiday reminder from the Seattle Police Department.

Monkey See, Monkey Sue

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Eugene Volokh at VC quotes extensively from the motion to dismiss in the simian selfie copyright case.  See also prior posts here and here and here.

Tweet of the Day

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From Pat Sajak:  "Studies show 92% of stats are manipulated to make political or social points, but if repeated, are believed by 96%."

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